Sunday, April 28, 2013


A little over a year ago I started looking into being a GC seriously and had gone all avenues to make sure it would not mess with my membership in my Church.  I know to some that might seem silly but to me it was so important that everything would be okay!

I had sent a letter in April 2012 to the First Presidency in my Church requesting more information on being a GC and more knowledge if this would be okay.  It has been a year and I have still not received a response from anyone about this.

I have come to terms with the fact that I may never get an answer or response because it really is a case by case situation.  There are quite a few things that my Church absolutely no on and this is not one of the things it says absolutely no on.  I have come to terms and am content with going off of prayer and temple visits to confirm doing this for the past year.  I have received very profound answers and felt that would suffice for myself.

My family on the other hand has been less then supportive of this and most have had very negative responses to me first coming out saying that I wanted to be a GC.  My dad in particular is having a really difficult time with it.  He knows how important being able to do temple sessions is for me and he was worried that I was just chancing all of that for doing this.  He has always said if I wanted him to fast for me that he would so recently I have asked him to fast, but this time not for myself.  I have asked him to fast and pray that he would received his own answer that this is okay.  I know that he will not receive the type of answer I did or be able to get the revelation for me about doing this but he can find out for himself.

Just like my dad, when I first wrote the letter to the First Presidency it was days before General Conference and I was hoping and praying that there would be some kind of talk about this particular subject.  There was not and I don't think there ever will be, at least at this time.  My dad was hoping this past General Conference in April he was hoping the same thing.  There wasn't anything about it, again as I don't think there will be.  This is a very personal decision that should be between yourself, the Lord and a spouse if you are married.  Since I am not married it was me and the Lord.  This is something I have continually confided in Him and talked to my Father in Heaven about.  I have cried over this decision and felt peace about everything.

About a year ago a fellow surrogate whose IPs were LDS (Latter Day Saints) asked their fertility doctor what was okay and what was not okay.  This particular fertility doctor received a response from the First Presidency about being a Gestational Carrier and you can read HERE about that!  I know the Church has a stance and view on surrogacy but I think they, for the most part let you council with the Lord and figure out what is best for your family.

I had made my decision and when  I moved into this new ward I knew that I wanted to tell my Bishop and Relief Society president about myself being a Gestational Carrier.  I was so nervous going into that office because of what happened the last time I had talked about doing this with my previous Bishop.  I was scared to say the least and was worried that it would be a negative experience even though I knew what the Lord had told me.

A side note on this; some of my extended family members say that the Lord won't tell me to do this and that it is more my just wanting to do it so badly.  If I really felt prompted that this is not something I should do then I wouldn't do it.  I have been divorced and that is and was one of the most difficult things I've ever had to make a choice on.  It is something I didn't take lightly and kept the Lord very close to me in my decision making process.  The same is with this, in my wanting to be a gestational carrier.  I have felt prompted since I was 18 years old, almost 10 years ago that I need to do this.  I am in a place where I have felt prompted that this is the time to do it.

When I was talking to the Bishop I was waiting for the perfect opportunity to tell him.  It felt like an eternity and like there was this ginormous elephant in the room that I couldn't just push away.  I finally blurted it out and was waiting for shock or horror or something awful to come out of his mouth.  Instead and much to my surprise he sent me praise and nothing but wonderful words about myself being a gestational carrier.  I started crying, no sobbing!!  I was so overwhelmed and so overjoyed that he said that this was amazing!  That he said it was okay for me to be a Gestational Carrier.  I am so grateful for his support and his better understanding of what is happening and going on.  This truly was an answer to my countless prayers!

I am still constantly praying and hoping that my family members and friends that don't understand and think this is bad will be able to pray and find out for themselves, how amazing this gift is and how wonderful it is!  I want them to listen to the Spirit and find out for themselves what is okay and what is not.  They still may disagree with me and that is okay but they can't take away the spiritual experiences I have had on this journey thus far.

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